IWS Coffee Mugs, Bringin' The January Thaw

January is such a cold, gloomy, and boring month that it always helps if people can help brighten the day and pick up the spirits of others as we forge that long trail through the long gruesome month of January.

And folks, we here at IWS Radio have in small increments, been able to shed some flickers of sunlight upon a handful of people wallowing in the gray cast of the winter.  And how have we done that, you ask?

Through the joy of IWS Radio coffee mugs!!

That’s Right!!  We have been sending IWS Radio mugs to loyal listeners and contributors throughout the world.

And let me tell ya, it hasn’t been painless.  When I sent a set of mugs down to Jayman in our Arkansas office, a couple of the collectibles arrived with broken handles…

Very sad…And when Jayman sent a mug to the lovely, rusty sandwich lovin’ Cracker, the hole in the bottom of the mug left her feeling empty…

But fear not, Jayman sent her another one that was solid as a rock.  That’s how we roll here at IWS Radio.

My second, third, and fourth attempts went off without a hitch.  No broken handle this go around.  The mug I shipped to the acerbic Jesse Ferg found its way to him one glorious piece…

The mug I sent to Tamra, who is the leading cause of nocturnal emissions of the IWS staff, arrived safely and was quickly embraced within her soft and loving...um...hands…

Lastly, and while I have no pictures…I received a phone call yesterday at the Beer Mine (conveniently located at the corner of Elmore and Burnett Rd. in Bagwine, Ohio.) that the sexiest Canadian to have ever roamed the earth and our IWS Canadian Bureau Chief Miss Jamie Mapleleaf, received her mugs in the same state that they left Ohio…in one piece.

A few more mugs have been or soon will be sent out to places such as California and Texas, so dig it…Our January IWS warmth is already tangible in six states and one province of Canada.   We are spreading the joy!! And…

We have been rewarded for our efforts.  While always in the top five in the Comedy ratings on BTR, yesterday our January 11th show hit Numero Uno on BTR.  That hasn’t happened in quite awhile.

So to all of you…Thanks for continuing to listen, for helping us out, and simply for being our friends.  And remember folks, these collectible coffee mugs won’t last forever so punch your ticket for one by joining the IWS Radio Looooooooove Train!!

Cheers!!

Matt-Man

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Jon Gruden and Others Got Told What's What 'n Such

This week on IWS Radio Matt and Jay decided it was time to tell a few people to “Shut Your Whore Mouth.” Of course, it was meant in the most loving and supportive way.

Matt did a good deed for a customer, but it cost Schmoop her Fritos.

Jayman did a good deed for the Jaymom and was surprised by the offers of assistance from his neighbors.

Lots of IWS Radio coffee mugs got sent out to very deserving people.

Jesse Ferg isn’t impressed with Mark May, Teenagers, Walmart Shoppers and others.

Nurse Sherri has completed her diagnosis and it’s hurtful.

Naya Rivera is nasty and Brandi Glanville repeats rumors about Joanna Krupa and Matt and Jay are very disturbed.

Steve Emmerson told us all about “No Go Zones” in France and England.

Ted Nugent is a coward and all-around piece of shit human being.

Jon Gruden is just stupid. Really fucking stupid.

The “Worst Songs of the Week” choices were OMG awful songs!!!

Rush Limbaugh is tired of all the guilty white liberals.

Bobby Kraft shared some of the hilarity of FavStar with everyone.

Sarcastic Sam blew Chris “The Philadelphia Freak” Matthews up!

Whispering Willie has lost it!

ESPN’s Chris “BOOMER” Berman has a real potty mouth!

Then Matt and Jay told lots and lots of people to “SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH!” Or something like that. Totally worth a listen! Maybe we ripped one of your favorite celebrities or pundits?

                               

IWS Person of the Week...Mitt Romney

Sunday as always, is Person of the Week day here on the IWS Radio website, and if there is one thing the staff and management here at IWS appreciate, is any person who holds on to his or her own dream like grim death, and attempts to keep it alive.

This week we honor such a person. A man who after two failed attempts to become President of the United States, is willing to stick his losing neck out there one last time.

Ladies and Gentlemen, our IWS Radio Person of the Week and close friend of the IWS Radio Show…Mr. Mitt Romney!!

See?  We here at IWS Radio know Mitt Romney to be a sweetheart and all-around nice guy, but some people who know nothing of him and his moral fiber, try to portray him as some type of Charles Dickens inspired villain…

We know better.  And we know that his third time running for President could be the charm, and as Mitt so accurately and eloquently describes his chances, he could be the next resident of the White House…

Anyway, and in spite of his problem with math, we are in full support of Mitt Romney, and hope he one day achieves his dream…and to those of you who say he should shut his whore mouth?

It’s falling upon our deaf ears because we love him, and obviously…He loves us…

And for more Shut Your Whore Mouth fun…Join Jay, Matt, and the entire IWS Radio gang today LIVE from Noon-2 PM ET on Blog Talk Radio as they present their Shut Your Whore Mouth n’ Such episode on IWS Radio.

Sarcasm and laughter will abound as Jay and Matt disparage every self-important blowhard, political pundit, celebrity, and person of every other walk of life that need to shut up and Shut Their Whore Mouth.

So join us LIVE TODAY from Noon-2 PM ET.  To listen LIVE, you can click right HERE!!

Nasty Naya Rivera and Andrew Luck Need to Shut Their Whore Mouths!

Nobody is a bigger defender of the first amendment than Matt-Man and Jayman. We support freedom of speech and freedom of expression 100%! But, just because you have freedom of speech, doesn't mean you should use it. There are some people out there who would be much better off if they just shut the fuck up. Most of these people are politicians, athletes, celebrities and political and sports pundits. Seriously, they're just embarrassing themselves.

Okay, so we'll mostly agree on that. There are, however, more people out there we've had enough of. Just regular everyday folks doing things like driving slow in the fast lane, searching for exact change at the register, sharing stupid "viral" videos on their Facebook page and lots of other annying things. Matt and Jay have had enough of all these people, famous or not, and they're not gonna take it anymore.

They will also continue the national discussion about freedom of expression including telling offensive jokes, mocking religion and even rape jokes. And just what the hell is "rape culture" and "slut shaming" anyway? Matt and Jay will break it all down for ya. Or something.

As always Jamie Mapleleaf and the IWS Players will be here to add to the discussion. Bobby Kraft has discovered the DPRK News Service Twitter feed and he is in love with those guys. Phil Diller is ready to kick off his big 2015 comedy tour. If you even mention the word "whore" Drew Peacock won't be far behind. And really, who knows what else might happen. IWS is nothing if not unpredictable. All this and YOUR CALLS this week on IWS Radio!

Tune in for "Shut Your Whore Mouth 'n Such" on IWS Radio this Sunday at 12 Noon ET!!! 

You Tube Is A Cruel Mistress

Cheeeeeeers Bitches and a Happy Friday to you all.  Do you know why I am coming to you on Friday rather than Thursday?  Of course you don’t, but allow me to assplain…

Oh sure, you may think it was because I was partying hard on Wednesday night, but I don’t.

Much like Protestants, I celebrate the Lord on Wednesdays for whatever reason.  Okay…seriously?  I don’t celebrate the Lord on Wednesday but I am at the Beer Mine til’ 9, so I don’t engage in a day full of debauchery.

Anyhoo…The reason and/or reasons that I forgot to post yesterday is due to more than a couple of contributing factors…

First of all, I am old.  I can’t remember what day is what anymore especially since my BFF Schmoop works different days every week.  I like a rigid schedule as far as work goes, but anymore with deli girl being all over the place schedule wise, my decrepit mind knows not what day it is.

A related factor is that the older I get, the more my less than stellar attention span becomes.  I have always been a, “I See Something Shiny” kind of guy, but as the years get longer, my attention span grows even shorter.

And perhaps, the biggest contributing factor of my forgetfulness about yesterday’s post was this…

With the addition to our Worst Song of the Week segment and more inclusive use of stupid audios spewed by others during the IWS Radio Show, I go onto You Tube more than ever, and this requires a lot of You Tube research.

See?  When I go onto You Tube to find a really bad song, and type in Wildfire by Michael Martin Murphey or whatever, other suggestions of songs pop up, and they are all horrid.  And?  I have to listen to all of them to make certain that I am not missing out on bringing you the very worst music ever recorded.

And this Sunday on the IWS Radio Show?  Jayman and I are talking about people who just need to shut the fuck up and shut their whore mouths, so…

Last night when I got home from the Beer Mine, I went to You Tube and conjured up video after video of famous and not so famous people saying incredibly stupid, annoying, and/or idiotic things, but here’s the problem…

I began searching around 11 PM and the next thing I knew, it was 1 AM and even though I hadn't eaten, I was exhausted and went to bed.  Funny thing about You Tube.

It sucks a person in with video suggestions and the next thing you know, it’s two hours later.  I hate You Tube, and…

I love it as well, and couldn’t live without it, however…it should have a growing old/ADD option where it shuts down for three minutes after playing one video.

Cheers!!

Matt-Man

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Headlines, Observations and Hot Takes

Holaaaaaaaaaaa! I couldn’t decide if I wanted to do headlines or hot takes tonight when I suddenly had a brilliant idea. I’ll do both! I’ll throw in some HI-larious headlines some hot takes on big topics of the day and maybe an observation or two about other things. O boy! This is gonna be fun. Maybe. Whatever.

An Observation...

I was watching the Golden Globes when Jeffrey Tambor won for the show “Transparent.” As he was giving his boring, soul-sucking brilliant and thoughtful acceptance speech I was thinking about him as the Mayor of Who-ville in the movie version of “How the Grinch Stole Christmas.” At one point in the movie the mayor throws a little fit and repeats “INVITE THE GRINCH – RUIN CHRISTMAS … INVITE THE GRINCH – RUIN CHRISTMAS!” over and over. So while he was talking all I could think of was “PLAY A TRANNY – WIN AN AWARD … PLAY A TRANNY – WIN AN AWARD!”

I thought about tweeting that, but you know that would have offended someone. We don’t want to do that now, do we? Oh sure, it’s true! If you play a transvestite or transgendered American or whatever you will at least get a nomination. If you play a gay character you will get a nomination and will probably win. Sean Penn won for playing Harvey Milk when we all know Frank Langella was far more deserving for his portrayal of Richard Nixon in “Frost/Nixon.” But, we’re not allowed to talk about these things cause that’s hurtful.

Here’s some headlines…

Mitt Romney announces he is considering making a third attempt to buy the U.S. Presidency.

French officials agree to allow Muslims to participate in freedom march, but remind them that hijabs are illegal.  

Area sports fan is angry at self for forgetting to blame referees for his team’s loss.

Another Observation …

Have you noticed that not only are we not allowed to make rape jokes anymore, but we aren’t even allowed to mock rapists who get away with it?? I’ve seen it twice now. Once after Florida State lost to Oregon and Twitter lit up with all kinds of jokes about Jameis Winston and FSU. The next time was after the Golden Globes when some people got all pissy at Tina Fey and Amy Poehler for going after Bill Cosby.

After the FSU game there were several FSU alum trying to make the claim that mocking Winston and FSU was THE SAME THING as mocking the girl who was Winston’s alleged sexual assault victim. Same thing happened Sunday night. Mocking Cosby is THE SAME THING as mocking all 30 plus women he allegedly raped.

That’s bullshit. All these people are doing is trying to protect their school or friend or hero or whatever. They don’t give a shit about the victims because they don’t believe there are any victims. But, the problem is if this type of thinking takes hold, we won’t ever be able to make fun of anyone. And if that happens the scumbags that attacked Charlie Hebdo last week win.

Okay, more headlines …

New hacktivist group Uber Anonymous emerges as top rival to Super Anonymous who was the top rival of Anonymouser who took down Anonymous.

Fox News sets up Twitter account to combat fake Fox News stories. Can’t figure out which ones are real. Shuts down in 24 hours.

Facebook user can’t decide whether to post his outrage over fake news story from satire site or share shitty viral video.

A Hot Take …

No … Just. No.

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Steve Kroft Is A Freak

Hi All…


Jay and Matt had a great show yesterday.

Steve Kroft showed up in order to escape his ass champagne drinking ways…

Matt and Schmoop got engaged…

Rev. Moneymaker was drunker than Hell, yet liked the fact that Matt and Schmoop lived no longer in sin.

Some of the worst songs ever were played…No…really.

Martin tried to calm us all down..

Schmoop called in our her new cell phone…Didn’t go well.

We celebrated the heroes of Charlie Hebdot.

We celebrated the late Bert Convy.

We later decided that the French were responsible for their evil fate due to bad music about pedophiles.

This post would be longer, but as we talked about Matt-Man being engaged, he has been ordered to bed.

Such a pity.

But for more Jay and Matt, please listen right here, as IWS Radio got their professional groove on, and made January a little more pleasant in spite of its brutal cold…