IWS Radio: Grillin' and Chillin' in Flanders Fields

Saturdays here on the IWS Radio website, typically involve a transcript of the intense show prep session in which Jay and Matt engage on Thursday mornings, but this Saturday..?

We here at IWS Radio know that this weekend being the official unofficial kick-off to summer, a time to reflect soberly upon the passing of those who gave all for this country, and a time to fire up the grill, get drunk and beat your spouse, perhaps you haven’t the time nor focus to read our provocative show prep transcript so…

Allow us to get straight to the point.

LIVE this Sunday May 25th from Noon-2 PM ET, the funniest, smartest, and most inclusive comedy show on Blog Talk Radio will be celebrating the somber and reflective Memorial Day Weekend as most Americans do…by Grillin’ and Chillin’ with Controversial Ingredients.

That’s right.

Jay, Matt, Bobby Kraft, Slyder Balzcock, Joshua, and Stubby Stonehenge will be on hand to set just the right tempo, tone, and timbre within the graveyards of our fallen, and the backyards of our barbecues, and get you into the Memorial Day mood.

Tammy Tibbles will bring some soul crushing happiness for all, Buddy Acapella will bring down the house with a moving rendition of Taps, and Canada’s own Jamie Mapleleaf will undoubtedly be lurking about providing north of the border hotness.

Jayman will be introducing the newest member of the IWS Radio team, as KleeShay Johnson makes his debut on the show.

The Jayman will speak out about his harrowing trip to Wal*Mart as well, as Matt-Man may wonder aloud about how he came to be BFFs with an uber-patriotic right wing hottie who often appears on FOX News.

IWS Radio will also talk about food.  Brat versus Sausage versus Burger versus fish on the grill. Really? Fish on the grill?

And what kind of person are you?  Gas Grill or Charcoal?

These are important matters, and IWS Radio will cover them all for you…and folks…We have the pleasure of having Giada de Laurentiis and her husband Todd stopping by with her their thoughts on what constitutes the perfect cook-out.

All of this somber yet hilarious action, plus your phone calls LIVE this Sunday from Noon-2 PM ET on IWS Radio.

To listen LIVE and prove yourself to be a true God-Fearing, God-Loving American, you click right HERE!!

Facebook is Worried About My Social Life

Holaaaaaaaaaa friends and lovers and all the lonely people out there tonight. I’ve been noticing a trend on Facebook lately. No, not all the bitching, bragging, winning, cheap shots, lame jokes and angry status updates people are posting. Those are a given. No, I’ve noticed that Facebook is worried about me. It seems as though Facebook is worried that I’m lonely and wants to help me out.

It all started out innocently enough. Facebook thought maybe I would like to join a singles site called Zoosk. They just wanted to let me know that I don’t have to be alone. Very sweet of Facebook.

After I didn’t respond to Facebook’s offer, they decided to get a little more specific for me. Next came the Christian Singles …

I have nothing against Christians, hell I am one, but let’s just say my views are a little more moderate than what I suspect I would find at that site. Besides, I’m not a raging racist and don’t hate gay people so I think I would have a hard time finding a match.

So, Facebook gave up on that and things took a strange turn. The next item on the Love Menu was Young Women Looking for Older Men! Whoa! That escalated quickly!

While I found this to be funny, I was still not tempted to dive into the online personals world. Also, that was a little unseemly. Facebook was not to be deterred however because they clearly did their homework and hit me with something they knew I wouldn’t be able to resist ….

Okay, so they finally had my attention, but I still wasn’t sure if it would be a good idea. I would have to come up with a personal bio to post and then put together an action plan for what to do after meeting a girl online. Not to worry though, Facebook thought of that too …

Okay, flowers are always a good idea. Girls always love flowers and when you pick her up for a date giving her flowers gets things off to a nice start. Of course, I have another problem …

Right! Gotta look good for that date right! But, there’s still another problem. I’m not much on going out. I prefer a more laid back casual evening …

There we go! Dinner and a movie at home! Damn Facebook! You’ve got my whole social life all planned out! Way to go and thanks!

Jayman3768@gmail.com
My Facebook
@Jayman_IWS

So Matt-Man Has Some Random Thoughts

So yesterday…

Jayman had some random thoughts, and I thought to myself, in a less than random manner, that maybe today, I would do the same.

So, heres goes…

I wonder if at some point while Trayvon Martin was on top of George Zimmerman allegedly wailing away upon Zimmerman, if he asked Mr. Zimmerman…

“Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

What?  Too soon? Anyhoo…

Prince William and the Duchess of Cambridge Kate Middleton, had a baby boy yesterday.  I hope that their son in honor of, and in solidarity with his grandfather Prince Charles, grows up to marry a man named Camilla.

I get off at 5 PM today, so you know what that means.  That’s right…I’ll be drunk by 7 PM.  Getting old does have its benefits.  Beer Buzzes come much more inexpensively.

I see that we are picking up a few more “likes” on our IWS Facebook page of late.  If you don’t like our Facebook page, you are a Communist and will spend the eternal afterlife in Hell being fondled by a bare-chested Vladimir Putin.  Uuch.

I had Johnsonville Cheddar Wurst last night.  They were delicious.  You know why?  Because what’s not delicious about cooked pig meat with cheese inside?  Nothing.  Yeah, it’s that simple.

Two of my favorite words are, “shenanigans” and “interloper.”  Is there a problem with that?  For your sake, I hope not.

In order to soothe racial tensions within this country, President Obama is spending a family vacation in Martha’s Vineyard.  The next stop along his, “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner Tour” will be spent hosting, “A Week of Skeet Shooting and Cocktails with Wayne LaPierre” in Roanoke, VA.

My right hamstring is killing me!!

My BFF Schmoop went to the Doctor for what appears to be the last time yesterday.  Her insides are fine, but looking at the rosy glow on her face, I think she may be pregnant…by HIM!!

If I was going be a fish of some sort, I would be a Killer Whale.  Even though they are menacing looking, they are friendly, and adorable…and no one messes with them, because they have “Killer” in their name.

If I wasn’t having brats last night, I would have had SPAM, but I wouldn’t have had it, because unfortunately, we have none on hand.  Mores the pity.

Yesterday, Jayman mentioned that he should have his penis post on here at some point.  When he mentioned that I thought I could do the same, however…

How’s my penis gonna do a sincere and articulate post when he can’t remember more than half of the places he has been?

I’ll just let my penis slumber in its old age and…Oh damn…I left a cigarette burning as I typed this.  Talk to you all later.

Cheers!!

Matt-Man

mattmaniws@ymail.com
@mattman_iws
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