MSJS: FIRE AT WILL!

Matt: Cheers ‘n shit.
Jay: Holawhatever.
Matt: Dude you need to cheer up.
Jay: I DO??? Sheesh.
Matt: Things have just been …. Blah lately.
Jay: A little Seasonal Affective Disorder
Matt: I guess.
Jay: But, things are looking up!
Matt: True. Schmoop got her unemployment!
Jay: And the ice and snow is about to melt away!
Matt: True. There are positive things happening.
Jay: And Britney Spears won a People’s Choice Award!
Matt: I’m so glad she’s back.
Jay: America is a better place when Britney is around.
Matt: Word.

Matt: So what was for supper?
Jay: You mean dinner?
Matt: What’s that?
Jay: That’s what you have as your evening meal?
Matt: Huh. Okay what was for supper?
Jay: Is that the evening meal?
Matt: It’s gonna be you LAST supper if you keep doing this!
Jay: Damn you’re touchy.
Matt: I’M ON EDGE JAYMAN! I’M ON EDGE!
Jay: Goodness! I had red beans and rice.
Matt: Oh, that’s not too bad at all.
Jay: IKR?! Whatchu havin’?
Matt: Chicken patties. Schmoop already made them.
Jay: Damn, that Schmoop is pretty thoughtful.
Matt: She’ll surprise you sometimes.
Jay: SNEAKY THOUGHTFUL!
Matt: Scrappy!
Jay: That’s how white women are.
Matt: True dat.
Jay: It doesn’t come naturally to them either.
Matt: God no! They have to work at it.

Jay: HEY! I know what always cheers you up.
Matt: What’s that?
Jay: Doing “hit pieces” on people.
Matt: Oooooo … that is always a good pick-me-up!
Jay: So let’s do it!
Matt: Who? Where? When?
Jay: On the show! Let’s take down all the a-holes!
Matt: I like it!
Jay: Just think of who you can’t stand.
Matt: Hmm … Sean Hannity, Al Sharpton, Rachel Maddow.
Jay: There you go. Take ‘em down this week.
Matt: We can do it! Who’s in your crosshairs?
Jay: Maybe Chris Hayes. Skip Bayless. A few others.
Matt: Jerks!
Jay: IKR? Also, maybe other pet-peeves.
Matt: Like?
Jay: Kids, old people, theme parties. Stupid shit.
Matt: There’s sooooo much stupid shit going on.
Jay: We can do this!
Matt: We MUST do this!
Jay: Oh one other person who needs the IWS treatment badly.
Matt and Jay: CHRIS CHRISTIE!!!!
Matt: Set phasers to destroy!
Jay: Let’s get to battle stations!
Matt: READY. FIRE. AIM!!!

Be sure to tune into “Hit Me With Your Best Shot” on IWS Radio Sunday night at 8 PM ET!!!