We're Setting Kids Up for Failure and They Deserve It

Holaaaaaaaaaaaaa! So, the other day I’m hanging out with the Jaymom when this happens…

Jaymom: M.E. is gotta go to Little Rock cause for her granddaughter’s graduation.
Jay: She’s graduating? Already?
Jaymom: And going to Central next year and will be a cheerleader.
Jay: That’s great, I guess.
Jaymom: And they’re coming up here for the 4^th of July and the granddaughter doesn’t want to. So M.E. told them “maybe she could stay with a friend” and M.E’s son said “NO! The family is going to spend the 4^thtogether and that means she will be with the family!”

Jay: Well okay then. I’m sure she’ll be so pleasant to be around.
Jaymom: I told M.E. she just has to hang on for two more years and she’ll be 18 and he can’t control her anymore.
Jay: True. Wait … You said she graduated and was going to Univ. of Central Arkansas next year.
Jaymom: What? Oh no! She graduated junior high and is going to Central High in Little Rock next year.

Jay: Oh for crying out loud! No … No … No … You only graduate TWICE! When you graduate high school and when you graduate college. That’s it! That’s the graduation list! You don’t graduate from pre-school and kindergarten and grade school and middle school and junior high school. Just high school and college. Sure, you can get advanced degrees and shit, but that’s all a bonus and doesn’t hold the same significance.

This is part of what’s wrong with kids today you know? They finish high school and they already have a wall full of diplomas and they think they’ve accomplished so damn much when in fact they haven’t accomplished a damn thing. It’s not like getting a high school diploma is all that difficult to do. I mean, if you’re a really crappy student you get passed along under what they call “social promotion” so you are around people in your own age group and if you put out any effort whatsoever at all you finish with a good enough GPA to get into community college or most state schools.

That’s why they started all this Advanced Placement crap. That’s the group of kids who have rich parents, parents who are “prominent” members of the community, or parents who are on the school board or are just popular kids. This is where the real grade inflation takes place. They get extra credit for being in these AP classes so they can separate them from the poor kids and middle class kids. That’s why the top dozen graduates all have over a 4.00 gpa!

So then you have these kids who have never struggled, never had to deal with any adversity graduating high school and they think their lives are gonna be so cushy and easy. Especially kids from these rich families. Nobody has ever said “no” to them and it never crosses their mind that someone might actually say “no” to them someday. So, the first time things go badly for them they fall apart.

Girls run into adversity and they become bitter feminists or start developing terrible self-confidence issues and maybe even an eating disorder and that just makes things worse. Aaaaaaaand the first time a boy gets told “no” will be by a girl and he’ll be so enraged that he will start calling all women “whores” and “cunts” and other names and eventually he’ll grab a couple of semi-automatic guns and mow down the neighborhood or shoot up a movie theater!

ALL BECAUSE THEY’VE BEEN CODDLED SINCE CHILDHOOD AND HAVE A WALL FULL OF FAKE ACCOMPLISHMENTS THAT GAVE THEM A HUGE SENSE OF ENTITLEMENT AND DIDN’T PREPARE THEM FOR HOW THE REAL WORLD WORKS!

Jaymom: *blink* *blink* …. Do you feel better?
Jay: A little
Jaymom: Wanna get pizza and watch a movie on Netflix?
Jay: Sure!

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Parents Today..? They Suck!!

Cheeeeeers Chuckleheads!!

I have some advice for you, and I have talked about this before…NEVER come through our Drive-Thru, the Beer Mine, without an idea of you want.

And by the same token…

Never go through the Drive-Thru line at Mickey D’s, Wendy’s, or in my case as it was tonight, Rally’s, without a purpose and agenda driven menu in mind.

Rally’s makes burgers, fries, other sandwiches, and ice cream cones,

Their menu, while delicious, is very Spartan-Like.

Why the fuck do some of you have to fuck up the ease and gliding through of Rally’s, by wanting your sandwiches, “special?”

Listen Mom Van/SUV driving soccer mom who has three kids, and a need to get the best deal possible because you can’t afford the Cadillac Escalade that you are in…

Could you please smack your kids, say, “give us five double cheeseburgers“, and then move on?

Noooooo, of course you can’t…

You have to explain to the whiny, high-pitched end of the Drive-Through speaker, that your precious Ashley, and your somber son Bryce, both hate onions, and while Ashley will accept a tomato on her burger, Bryce simply will not!!

Poor Bryce…

And while not afflicted with a peanut allergy, one of Bryce’s future High School buddies is going to kick his ass no later than the tenth grade for holding up their buddy’s car in the Drive-Thru lane, because you have turned him into a self-obsessed weenie who demands that no tomato shall grace his bun.

Where exactly do you fucking people come from?  Oh, I know…

From the United States of uhMEica!!

Why do I say that, you ask? Because many of you people who frequent a Drive-Thru at a fast food joint, or a bank, or someplace like the Beer Mine, are overly self-involved…and lazy.

I have had people come through with kids, and while Mom says that she wants a pack of cigarettes of whatever kind, I have three cars outside waiting all the while she also says…

“My children are deciding what kind of chips that they want.”

First of all, one does not grocery shop in a Drive-Thru, and secondly, your kids should get whatever the hell chips that YOU decide that they should get, and if they don’t like them?

Fuck Em’!!

I know that four year old Crystal and six year old Nathan are very cute, but there are thirsty beer drinking people behind you and your spawn, and that is where we make our money!!

Oh, and by the way, Ms. Mother To Two and Wife To None, I didn’t appreciate that you just complained about our cigarette prices.  Sure..

We are a bit higher than most, but that is because you don’t have to get out of your car.

And really?  Isn’t that a lot of trouble for you; I know how you like the drive-by transaction?  Oh…

Here’s a couple of suckers for the kids; tell them that dinner is on me.

Cheers!!

Matt-Man

mattmaniws@ymail.com
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